Videos

Parenting solutions that work for neurodivergent kids.

I created videos for some of my best parenting strategies and they're all on my YouTube channel. You'll also find videos of podcast interviews and some of my favorite videos for parents of neurodivergent kids from others.

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This time on Beautifully Complex, I'm exploring behavior struggles and conscious discipline with my guest, Wendy Snyder, a positive parenting educator and family life coach. We discuss how understanding behaviors as communication changes our perspective, helping us view challenges as signals of need and teaching opportunities. Join us as we dive into how creating a sense of belonging and safety at home allows our kids to thrive under our guidance. Wendy shares her expertise on managing our own triggers and approaching parenting with empathy and intention. Tune in for practical advice to help you be the parent your kids need. KEY TAKEAWAYS 1. Understanding and Connection are Crucial: It's vital to understand that children's challenging behaviors are often a form of communication. Approaching these behaviors with empathy and striving to connect can transform discipline into a moment of teaching and bonding. Recognizing the essence of behaviors as a plea for help or attention can fundamentally change how we respond. 2. Reframing Perspectives: Labeling children with terms like "stubborn" or "difficult" can be detrimental. Instead, describing them as "determined" or "persistent" focuses on positive traits. This positive reframing helps nurture their potential leadership qualities. 3. Handling Behavior with Dignity: Parenting must respect a child or teen’s dignity. Understand that both kids and parents get triggered, and it's important to handle these situations without escalating or responding with fear or punishment. By remaining calm and respectful, parents can maintain their dignity as well. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN - Understanding the impact of emotional connection on behavior: You’ll learn how creating a sense of belonging and understanding within the family can calm a child's nervous system, making them more receptive to guidance and mentorship. - Reframing behavior as communication: You'll gain insights into viewing challenging behavior not as defiance or misbehavior, but as a form of communication, expressing needs or emotions that your child or teen may not yet know how to articulate otherwise. - Parenting with dignity using logical consequences: You will discover how to handle behavioral challenges with dignity, in a way that maintains the child's and your own sense of self-respect. - Regulating your own response: Learn strategies to manage your own triggers during intense parenting moments. By recognizing your body's signals and learning how to slow down and signal safety to yourself, you can respond more effectively to your kid. - Building bravery and resilience: You'll explore how facing fears within the parenting journey can foster bravery and resilience, not just in yourself but also in teaching these qualities to your child by handling challenges together. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/264 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent children, teens, and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
264 Handling Behavior Struggles with Dignity, with Wendy Snyder
In this episode, I'm chatting with my guest Daniel Maigler, about the transformative roles of emotional support animals. Dan's insights as a social worker and mental health advisor for Paws for Patrick reveal how emotional support animals can aid those facing mental health challenges. @pawsforpatrick Dan shares the poignant story behind Paws for Patrick, emphasizing the support ESAs can offer, especially to young people. Throughout this episode, he differentiates between therapy dogs, service animals, and emotional support animals, clarifying common misconceptions. From legalities to the non-requirement of training for ESAs, we're tackling the myths and discussing the urgency for more emotional support options in schools. For any listener interested in the healing potential of animals and understanding the process for obtaining an ESA, this episode provides clarity and heartfelt testimony. KEY TAKEAWAYS 1. Emotional support animals (ESAs) do not require any specific training and can significantly benefit individuals with mental health struggles by providing comfort and reducing anxiety, depression, and other symptoms. ESAs can be any type of animal, and their presence can facilitate social interactions and reduce stigma around mental health. 2. The process of getting an ESA involves obtaining a letter from a licensed mental health professional, medical doctor, or other part of the individual's health team. This letter must state that the individual has a mental health disability that could benefit from an ESA. Housing providers under FHA rules must accommodate ESAs without charging pet fees, and colleges and universities often do the same. 3. There's a distinction between Emotional Support Animals, Therapy Animals, and Service Animals, each with different roles and levels of training. ESAs require no training and offer comfort, whereas Therapy Animals (for example, dogs) receive moderate training and typically work in facilities like hospitals and schools, and Service Animals receive extensive training to perform specific tasks for people with disabilities. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN 1. Understanding Emotional Support Animals (ESAs): You'll learn what an ESA is, how it differs from other types of support animals like service animals or therapy animals, and the types of animals that can be considered for emotional support. 2. The Benefits of ESAs: You'll discover how ESAs can help improve mental health, reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety, and even strengthen social connections and reduce stigma. 3. How to Legally Qualify for an ESA: You'll find out the process for legally qualifying for an ESA, including who can write an ESA letter, what the letter must include, and the protections it offers for housing and college dorms. 4. Acquiring and Training ESAs: You'll learn about the resources available to help you acquire an ESA, with insights into costs, training, and organizations that offer support, such as Paws for Patrick, which can also provide financial assistance for obtaining and training ESAs. 5. Addressing Common Misconceptions: You'll get clarification on common misconceptions surrounding ESAs, including the legitimacy of organizations that connect individuals with clinicians for ESA letters and the unnecessary barriers people often believe are required. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/262 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent children, teens, and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
262 Emotional Support Animals with Daniel Maigler, LCSW
In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I tackle why our kids and teens might use extreme language to express their emotions. We're recognizing that expressions like "I hate you" or phrases that include aggression or violence often aren't literal but signal an inability to articulate complex emotions. I talk about the importance of distinguishing between different feelings and emphasize the role parents play in guiding their kids to understand and communicate their emotions more precisely. Through my experiences and the stories I share — like my child's alarming description of a recess incident — I highlight how easy it is to misunderstand our kids' emotional needs. We'll unpack essential skills like social emotional learning, interoception, and how to be the calm anchor for your kids. Listen in for practical strategies to improve your child’s emotional communication. KEY TAKEAWAYS 1. Understanding Emotional Extremes: Recognize that when kids and teens use extreme language or exhibit extreme behavior, it's often a sign that they're struggling to communicate the depth of their emotions, not necessarily that they intend to act on these statements. 2. Teaching Emotional Nuance: It's crucial to help kids understand the spectrum of emotions beyond just happy, mad, or sad, and to teach them how to express their feelings in more appropriate and nuanced ways. This includes building their skills in social-emotional learning and interoception. 3. Parental Response Strategies: When faced with extreme emotional expressions by kids, parents should strive to not take statements personally and maintain a calm presence to offer co-regulation. Once regulated again, you work on building your kid’s skills in identifying, interpreting, and communicating their feelings. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN 1. Understanding Emotional Extremes: You'll learn why kids may express their emotions in extreme ways and the importance of understanding these behaviors to effectively address them. 2. Identifying Root Causes: You'll discover how to interpret what extreme language or actions may indicate about your child's or teen’s emotional state, including feeling emotionally or psychologically unsafe or being unable to self-regulate. 3. Improving Communication Skills: You'll gain strategies for teaching kids how to express the intensity of their emotions accurately, helping them to communicate feelings like fear or anger in more nuanced and appropriate ways. 4. Social Emotional Learning: You'll learn about tools to help children understand the different degrees of their emotions, allowing for better self-expression and emotional management. 5. Practicing Regulation Techniques: You'll get insights into interoception and co-regulation, crucial skills for helping kids express their feelings appropriately. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/261 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent children, teens, and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
261: Extreme Language Around Emotions, with Penny Williams
In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I have the pleasure of talking with ⁨@ShariLeid of An Imperfectly Perfect Life. Together, we’re talking about purposeful living and parenting and celebrating gradual progress over the pursuit of perfection. Shari shares her deep insights on the value of recognizing and fostering the inherent strengths in our children. We confront societal expectations head-on, discussing the critical importance of valuing imperfections and the individuality of each journey. This episode is rich with reflection on the concepts of resilience and authenticity in the context of modern parenting. KEY TAKEAWAYS 1. Embrace Individuality and Neurodiversity: Celebrate the unique qualities and strengths of neurodivergent kids, teens and adults.. We discuss the value of building confidence and resilience by embracing imperfections and recognizing that differences make us beautifully complex. 2. Focus on Progress Over Perfection: We advocate for a shift away from the pursuit of perfection in parenting, emphasizing the need to acknowledge progress and the present moment. We suggest fostering an environment where mistakes are viewed as opportunities for growth and teaching children to reflect on their experiences instead of outcomes. 3. Strengths-Based Parenting Approach: Our conversation underscores the necessity of adopting a strengths-based approach to parenting. This involves guiding kids to find self-acceptance, encouraging regular self-reflection, and modeling vulnerability. By teaching kids resilience, grit, and healthy ways to navigate failures and successes, parents can support their children's journey towards becoming confident individuals. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/260 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent children, teens, and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
260: Navigating Life Challenges with Purpose and Progress (not perfection), with Shari Leid
Let's talk about what to do when your neurodivergent kid isn't listening. Remember, they might be processing your words in non-traditional ways, so it's important to find alternative approaches to help them focus, process, and follow through. From recognizing distractions to accommodating slow processing speeds, I offer practical advice to help parents navigate these complex situations, including how to engage them physically, provide written instructions, and be mindful of their individual needs. By understanding these hurdles and meeting your kid where they are, you can foster better communication and cooperation. Join me! KEY TAKEAWAYS 1. Kids may be listening and processing information in non-traditional ways, such as while engaged in an activity or without making eye contact. 2. Avoid repeating yourself or nagging if you feel like your kid isn't listening, as pressure can cause them to shut down. Instead, find alternative ways to help them pay attention and process instructions. 3. Be mindful of potential reasons for apparent inattentiveness, such as distractions, slow processing speed, dysregulation, and poor executive functioning. Adjust your communication and support strategies accordingly to meet your child where they are. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/258 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent children, teens, and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
258: What to Do When Your Kid Isn’t Listening with Penny Williams
🌟 Feeling stuck trying to motivate your teen or young adult? You're not alone — and you're not without hope. In this episode of Beautifully Complex, Dr. Melanie McNally @destinationyou breaks down exactly how to spark motivation in a way that actually works — by tackling tech habits, tapping into curiosity, building grit, and creating realistic goals. 💬✨ You'll learn why motivation is a skill set, not a personality trait — and how small, powerful steps can reignite your child's drive for success (without constant battles or burnout). 💪 If you're ready to stop feeling frustrated and start seeing real progress, this conversation is your roadmap. Hit play, take a breath, and know you can help your child find their path — one step at a time. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/256 🌟 Subscribe for more expert guidance and real-world strategies for raising neurodivergent teens and young adults. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨ #BeautifullyComplexPodcast #MotivationMatters #ParentingTeens #NeurodivergentParenting #TeenSuccess
256 Teens, Young Adults & Motivation with Melanie McNally Psy.D.
Do you ever feel like you're stuck in the same battle over and over again with your child? In this episode, I'm joined by Dr. Richard Selznick — psychologist, author, and expert in shutdown learners — to unpack what's really going on beneath the surface of power struggles with neurodivergent kids. We talk about: ✔️ Why your child might be “unmotivated” or shutting down — and what’s often missed ✔️ The truth about “fixing” our kids (hint: they’re not broken!) ✔️ Giving kids meaningful choice to reduce meltdowns and foster cooperation ✔️ Simple, effective language to defuse tough moments and reset without shame ✔️ How to shift your mindset for more peace, less conflict, and better connection Dr. Selznick offers practical insights you can use today, all grounded in compassion and clarity. Whether you're navigating meltdowns, school avoidance, or homework resistance, this episode is a powerful reminder that you're not alone, and there is a path forward. 👇 LISTEN NOW and leave a comment to share your biggest “aha” moment! 🔗 Show notes and resources: https://parentingadhdandautism.com/253 📚 Learn more about Dr. Selznick and his books at: https://shutdownlearner.com 🌟 Subscribe for weekly episodes with parenting experts, real talk, and strategies that actually work for your complex kid. Explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
253 Beyond Power Struggles with Richard Selznick
In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I have a candid conversation with Anouk Briere-Godbout about the challenges of parenting neurodivergent children. Our discussion focuses on the impact of societal pressure on parental confidence and the importance of finding supportive communities for parents facing similar struggles. Anouk shares personal experiences and professional insights, emphasizing self-compassion, resilience, and the need for a mindset shift in addressing the unique needs of neurodivergent children. If you’ve felt judged about your parenting in public, listening to this episode will make you feel so much less alone! WHAT YOU’LL LEARN 1. The impact of societal pressure on parental confidence and decision-making for parenting neurodivergent children, and actionable strategies for managing and overcoming this pressure. 2. How to cultivate self-compassion and prioritize self-care as a parent of a neurodivergent child, including practical tips for building a supportive community and seeking out resources and support. 3. Strategies for handling challenging public situations with neurodivergent children, such as staying regulated, prioritizing the child's needs, and managing judgment and societal pressures. 4. An understanding of the challenges faced by parents of neurodivergent children, and guidance on building a community of support, including how to connect with other parents facing similar experiences both locally and online. Ready to transform your parenting approach and deepen your connection with your child? 💖 Subscribe to "Beautifully Complex," share this episode, and explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
Ep. 251 Impact of Parental Confidence & Social Pressure on Parents of Complex Kids, Anouk
Ever feel like you're speaking a different language than your child? You're not alone, and this episode of "Beautifully Complex" is here to bridge that gap. Join me, Penny Williams, in a heartfelt conversation with the insightful Emily Hamblin for Episode 250, "Recognizing Your Children's Unique Love Languages." If you're a parent longing to connect on a deeper level with your neurodivergent or twice-exceptional child, this is a must-listen! Key Takeaways: - Recognize & Respect Individual Love Languages: Learn how Emily discovered her children’s unique ways of expressing love, from repetitive calling to sensory preferences like physical touch. - Parenting Neurodivergent Children: Hear Emily's personal journey from struggling with difficult behaviors to understanding the need for a different, more compassionate parenting approach. -Celebrate Small Victories: Discover the power of praising effort and not just outcomes, fostering an empowering growth mindset in your child. - Emotional Connection Over Material Gifts: Understand that giving and receiving gifts can be a heartfelt love language, not just a material exchange. - Quality Time Matters: Find out how to tailor quality time to meet the individual preferences of each of your children, and why even a few dedicated minutes can make a world of difference. - Words of Affirmation & Acts of Service: Gain insights on how small gestures like notes and helpful acts can significantly boost your child's emotional well-being. Ready to transform your parenting approach and deepen your connection with your child? 💖 Subscribe to "Beautifully Complex," share this episode, and explore more resources and support at https://ParentingADHDandAutism.com and https://RegulatedKids.com. Hit the like button if you found this episode helpful, and don't forget to leave a comment with your thoughts or questions down below! 🌈✨
250 Recognizing Your Children's Unique Love Languages with Emily Hamblin on Beautifully Complex
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Ready or not… the school year’s coming.

But chaos, meltdowns, and last-minute scrambling don’t have to come with it.

Back to School Prep Week is your 5-day, done-with-you plan to get your routines, supports, and emotional systems in place — before first-day tears, IEP surprises, and sensory overload take over. Prep Week is for parents of neurodivergent kids who want:

  • Mornings that don't end in meltdowns.
  • Teachers who actually understand their kid.
  • Systems that hold your family, even on hard days.

You’ll get:

  • Personalized systems.
  • Practical tools and templates.
  • Peace of mind.
Yes please! Sign me up! ⟶