Want more parenting tools & strategies to reduce the struggles?
You've tried so much of the advice out there, and yet, your child and your family are still struggling.
In this free video series, you'll get quick and simple tips and mindset shifts to create improvement fast. I cover the following parenting challenges: Yelling Too Much, Wishing Life Could be Easier for You and Your Child, Emotional Dysregulation & Poor Self-Regulation, Feeling Stuck, Helpless, and Hopeless, Feeling Like Chaos & ADHD/Autism Are Hijacking Your Family, and Constantly Battling with Your Child.
Another question.
Well after the storm has passed, many people have been hurt by this, emotionally and physically. It’s tricky because his brain is flooded and I understand this, but what happens about the punched sister or verbally abused brother? How do you handle the aftermath where several people were hurt in the meltdown?
That’s a tough one. Despite being behind developmentally, the end goal is that they behave appropriately, knowing it may be a few years later than their peers when they achieve it. Your goal right now should be (1) to try to see meltdowns before they happen or prevent triggers and to remove others from the vicinity whenever possible; and (2) work on changing those behaviors with empathy and compassion. So, rather than a punishment for hitting in that instance, when you know he wasn’t in control, wait until he’s calm and thinking clearly and talk about what happened and more appropriate choices for next time.
I just wanted to say THANK YOU!! I have recently come across your podcast, and I have had so many Aha! moments while listening. This one specifically and I have been through this exact thing (not at a goodwill store lol!) the intesity, the emotion, the cyclical chanting, the throwing himself at me etc. Its heartbreaking. I had my hubby listen to this one too and I found him nodding along to your experience also. I just purchased 2 of your books, and can’t wait to dive in. I purchased both of Dr Greene’s books as well. <3
Thank you!
I’m so glad that story has helped others! We were so blindsided when that happened, and so grief-stricken when we realized he absolutely had no control. Those meltdowns are heartbreaking. BUT, understanding them, meeting them with compassion and empathy, and working on the causes will reduce the number of meltdowns a great deal. My son is 16 now. It’s been so long ago that I can’t count since the last full-on meltdown. Years!